Like
all of us, my son Jonathan, craves independence – freedom.
How
do I know this?
Well,
first of all I know my son. I’m with him more than anyone else. But the most
convincing evidence is observance of his actions and reactions.
When
he wanders off, he’s not running away (like the police who help us find him
believe), he’s relishing the idea of going someplace on his own, without being
followed or watched.
In
a restaurant, he longs to make his own food choices and scowls if suggestions
are made. Occasionally he refuses to sit with us and moves to another table.
I’m not offended. I understand he wants his own space.
At
the store, he chooses items he likes, with no regard for cost and becomes very
aggravated when asked to put something back.
He likes
to stay up all night so he can have freedom to do whatever he wishes, without someone
telling him to shower, shave, take his meds, put on clean clothes and a myriad
of other directives that steer him toward a bit of responsibility.
If
rushed, he balks, often freezing in place, because he wants the freedom to do
it in his time and his way.
Jon
has few choices in life. To give my son a small taste of the independence he
craves, I have become incredibly adept at appearing to be uninterested in what
he’s doing while constantly watching or following from a distance. Sometimes I
am called out for this by strangers in public places, who don’t understand. They
accuse me of being inattentive.
Maybe
they don’t understand that true love recognizes the unspoken needs and desires
of another and makes allowances for them.
What
Jon doesn’t comprehend is this; freedom is not a license to do what we want whenever
we want. It is a privilege that directs responsible living.
We are not given liberty for selfish means with no thought of the ripple effect our actions have on others. Freedom, lived out properly, sets us and everyone within our sphere of influence, free.
We are not given liberty for selfish means with no thought of the ripple effect our actions have on others. Freedom, lived out properly, sets us and everyone within our sphere of influence, free.
Choice
is a wonderful thing but it also has consequences, not just for us but also for
those around us. When Jon chooses to not take his meds and is sick, not be
ready on time for an appointment, not be safe by wandering away, it affects us in colossal ways.
His desire for independence does not encompass the enormity of the consequences created for those who love and care for him.
His desire for independence does not encompass the enormity of the consequences created for those who love and care for him.
From
the very beginning we understand God created man with options and never forces
us to do, say or choose the right thing. He watches and follows us from a
distance if need be, His heart bursting with love and concern for our well-being.
We
may push Him aside or away, but He is always waiting in the wings for us to
choose righteousness, to choose what is best, to choose Him.
And
when we wander far away, He recklessly searches for the one lost sheep, gathers
it in His arms and brings it back to the safety of the sheepfold.
I’m
not certain my son will ever understand how much he needs me, a flawed and often
inadequate mother.
I,
however, never want to forget how much I need my perfect, powerful, loving God.
My only hope for true freedom lies in knowing Him.
He gave up everything, laid down His life so I could.
He gave up everything, laid down His life so I could.
So
you could.
Don’t
see Him? Don’t feel Him? Turn around and look.
There
He is..watching and waiting from a distance, just like I do with my Jon.
He
never takes His eyes (or His love) off of you.
He
is waiting to set you free.
Galatians 5:1 It is
for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do
not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
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