In 1985, while living in New Hampshire, we heard of a small
church in a small town, south and slightly west of Portland, Maine, that needed
a pastor. Mike was asked to fill the pulpit on rotating Sundays until this
congregation could find someone permanent. The first Sunday we were there, a
couple who attended the church invited us over for lunch. From that day until
this, some twenty eight years later, Earl and Pat have impacted our lives in
ways I would never imagine.
Like all of us, I’ve had innumerable acquaintances and
friends over the years, but I’ve discovered that there are only a handful of
folks in life that spark a connection that is both immediate and deep. From the
moment you say, “Hello, my name is….” they are destined to be indelibly
inscribed on your heart. This was the instantaneous bond that took place between
Pat and I that Sunday, with no regard for the twenty years in age difference
between us.
As circumstances would have it, we became pastor of that
small church for a time and moved to Maine. Our friendship with Earl and Pat
deepened and evolved past the norm. We became family, though we don’t share a
drop of natural blood. Being part of God’s family, with the precious spirit of Christ
coursing through our veins, while sharing life together made us family in every way
possible.
By the time Earl retired from his trade and took up another
occupation on Catalina Island, off the coast of California, we were moving back
to New Hampshire. The miles between didn’t discourage us though. There were many trips, criss-crossing to
wherever we each happen to live at the moment; California, New Hampshire, back
to Maine when they finally returned to New England and then to Florida following our
move here. After months or even a few
years of separation, it was as if we had never been apart. We just picked up where
we left off and expanded the bond of love even further.
Earl and Pat accepted and loved our oldest son, born with special
needs and all the challenges that presented, without hesitation. Pat was with
me when our second son was born and watched him come into the world. They gladly
became substitute grandparents to our boys. Pat helped and encouraged me
through years of struggling with severe rheumatoid arthritis, even while she
was dealing with chronic illness herself. She was there for me when my mother passed
away. We have carried each other through many sorrows, cried together, prayed
together, laughed hysterically as often as possible and rejoiced together in
times of joy and celebration.
I write this on a
plane, flying back home to Florida after visiting my beloved “family” in Maine.
I am now the age Pat was when we first met and Earl and Pat are getting along
in years. Pat has health issues that make it difficult for them to travel like
they once did, but as the years pass, our love for one another remains immovable,
solid, strong.
We are not given the option to select the family we are born into and even though we choose our friends, I believe God directs our steps and
the details of our days. He ordains certain people to come along side and walk with
us and they decide whether to remain in our lives or not. The few that stick it
out through all our stuff are true jewels. Those who see and know us as we
truly are, in our strengths, weaknesses, faults, failures, through the better
and worse, and keep coming back, are the genuine treasures in life we all hope
to find. These rare gems outshine all
others, just like the beautiful sea glass that my children used to uncover, hidden
in billions of stones on our favorite Maine beach.
Pat has filled many roles in my life - as needed: friend,
sister, mother, grandmother, counselor, comforter, caregiver; but most of all
she is the true definition of family and because of her and Earl, I and my
family have been blessed beyond measure. At this moment, while I contemplate the mystery
and delight of our long lasting friendship, I am aware that I am inept to adequately
express my gratitude…..
So I just say, to my beloved friends, from the very depths
of my heart……I love you and thank you for being my family.
Proverbs 17:17 (The Message Bible) Friends love
through all kinds of weather, and families stick together in all kinds of trouble.