Dead Right!

King David’s relationship with his son Absalom, had been strained for several years, after Absalom killed his half brother Amnon (2 Samuel 13). And now, in 2 Samuel 15, we find David and a large group of loyal followers leaving Jerusalem when the king receives word that his son has launched a rebellion and is on his way to the city to overtake the throne. Once again David is running for his life, this time from his own child (2 Samuel 15-18).

After Absalom arrives in Jerusalem and discovers his father is gone, Absalom begins to plot how to find and kill him.  One of David’s trusted advisors, Hushai, has stayed behind under the pretense of switching allegiance to Absalom, but undercover, he is relaying Absalom’s intentions and actions as they unfold, to David, by messenger. 

Ahithophel, Absalom’s top chosen advisor, recommends rallying troops to go after David immediately, but after Absalom listens to Hushai’s counsel, he decides to follow his plan instead.  After all, Hushai has been a close and trusted friend of King David and would have knowledge of the King that no one else does and Absalom, at this point, has no indication to distrust Hushai’s intentions.

Behind the scene, God is using Hushai to reverse Ahithophel’s strategy (which actually was the best one for defeating David) to bring disaster down on King David’s rebellious son, Absalom.

How it all ends is not the most important point of this drama. Let's spotlight on this scripture for a minute - 2 Samuel 17:23:

“When Ahithophel saw that his advice had not been followed, he saddled his donkey and set out for his house in his hometown. He put his house in order and then hanged himself. So he died and was buried in his father’s tomb.”(NLT)

Wow! When I read this I had to stop and consider, how many times in my own life, would I rather been dead than have my opinion rejected, ignored, overlooked? Maybe not literally dead, but the, “You don’t like what I believe or say so I’m going to pack myself up and cut myself off from you and anyone else who does not value what I think,” kind of dead. 

This mindset is a growing norm in our society. People are polarizing around issues of government, politics, religion, ethics, morals, lifestyles and behavior. Everyone wants to be heard, be right, and all who disagree, on either side of the divide, are considered intolerant, hateful and narrow minded. It’s an all out, “I’m right and you’re wrong,” continuous brawl!

Many years ago, Mike went to visit a church member who was in a mental ward. As this guy shared his plight, he confessed there were things in his past he couldn’t let go of because he was right and “those people” were wrong. Mike asked him, “Would you rather get out of here or be right?” The man’s reply was, “I’d rather be right.” That man could still be in that psyche ward; maybe he died in there for all we know. Sometimes there’s a high price for always needing to be right.

Back in the narrative of 2 Samuel – Absalom thought he had a right to the crown but he died in the war that ensued as he tried to escape from some of David’s men that came upon him. They found Absalom hanging by his long, thick hair that tangled in a fat tree branch after his mule kept going and left him dangling there. And his big-ego counselor, Ahithophel, needed to be right so much, that he hanged himself all because his opinion went unheeded!

The only one really in the right here was David, who had already learned the hard way that being so is not more important than being king, being cast from God’s presence or falling out of relationship with a son or friend. Just a read through the Psalms of David allows us to see how he experienced the lessons of pride, humility, exaltation, brokenness, reliance upon self or trust in God. 

Jesus laid down his rights to be right and died for us. Before doing so, He told us to love one another as He loved us (1 John 3:16). That’s a colossal assignment!

When being right and having the last word becomes more important than relationships with people, God, or living a life of peace and contentment, serious trouble is brewing.

Don’t get ‘hung up’ on always being right. I’m painfully and slowly learning it’s better to humbly die to self, than be dead right; cut off from the Spirit of God in my life and those I am called to love and serve! 

That’s way too great a price and one I’m not willing to pay, anymore.

Psalm 34:18  The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite [humble] spirit.

Philippians 2:3-8  Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.

John 10:17-18  The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life…No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord.

Embracing Your Thorn

At Israel’s request for a king, Saul was appointed and anointed as their first, by the prophet Samuel (1 Samuel 10).  When Samuel gathered the people together to confirm the new king, he couldn’t be found. God had to reveal to Samuel where Saul was and Samuel may have had doubts about God’s choice when he discovered the new king was hiding among the supplies. This man, though tall and handsome, had major confidence issues. 

Can you imagine a president of the United States so insecure that he hides in a White House closet on Inauguration Day and someone has to find and convince him to show up for the ceremony? That was Saul!

Fast forward five chapters and several years and we find Saul a very different man. He has now disobeyed God’s battle orders in several wars against neighboring nations, and has gone so far as to set up a monument to himself (1 Samuel 12:15). King Saul is so confidently full of himself, he actually believes he has done God a favor in his disobedience, and when he is confronted by Samuel, Saul is more worried about what the people will think (verse 30) than what he has done.

Centuries later, another Saul, highly educated and convinced of his own righteousness in Pharisee law, persecutes and kills those following the way of Jesus, who claims to be the Messiah, the Son of God. In the early days of the church, Saul, becomes a believer and is called to preach the Gospel after a dramatic and personal encounter with Jesus (Acts 9). Saul, renamed Paul, is given great revelation from God and becomes a man of incredible influence, an Apostle and a leader among leaders - traveling, establishing churches, speaking and writing. His revelations from God comprise a significant amount of the Bible’s New Testament. 

Paul was a very prideful man before his conversion.  It would have been easy for him to transfer this pride to the new authority and knowledge he was given, but to prevent him from becoming haughty and conceited, Paul admits, “lest I be exalted above measure by the abundance of revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me,” something that continuously troubled and battered him. Scholars differ about what that thorn might have been, but Paul states clearly its purpose was to keep him humble, his feet firmly planted on solid ground, his heart continuously searched and surrendered before God (2 Corinthians 12:6-10).

There’s a huge lesson in the account of these two Sauls for those who are in leader roles. Abraham Lincoln said, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.” Whether you lead a family, a classroom, a committee, a boardroom, a business, platoon, army, ministry, church, city, state or country – beware!  Pride and power NEVER mix.  

It’s easy to lose perspective in a place of authority, a few accolades and victories, several successes under our belt and we gradually forget our humble beginnings and what God has brought us from. We start building monuments to our self and our accomplishments, using position for selfish gain and putting power ahead of serving people. Sometimes it’s such a subtle slide we don’t even see it happening until we’ve gone too far. Always be on the alert for the danger of leader pride!

Paul pleaded with God for his “thorn” to be removed and God said no. If you are a leader and have a thorn in the flesh, some circumstance, trouble, irritation, frustration, that keeps you planted and rooted in the reality of who you are without Christ, be thankful for it! If you don’t…well…you might want to ask for one. 

It could be the thing that saves your heart, life, reputation and the people you are called to help and serve.

Proverbs 3:34, James 4:6 “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” 

Ultimately, the only power to which man should aspire is that which he exercises over himself. ~Elie Wiesel~